Whether or not it was Fifty Shades of Grey that sparked your interest in BDSM, it’s no secret the world of bondage, discipline, dominance and submission makes for one scorching read. The problem, of course, is that many who actually live the lifestyle found the story of Christian and Ana to be inaccurate at best and problematic at worst.
Despite having some sizzling scenes (I did love that riding crops had their moment thanks to the franchise), there’s a whole lot more that goes into being both a dom and a sub than Mr. Grey’s “red room of pain.”
From addictive series highlighting BDSM bonds to informative how-to guides, we’ve found the best of the best. Whether you’re looking to step into a dom/sub role, or you just want a sexy story to fulfill your fantasies, here are some must-read page-turners to really get you going:
1. Bared To You by Sylvia Day
Fifty Shades of Grey fans, if you haven’t read Bared to You by Sylvia Day, this is officially your sign from the universe. There are a lot of parallels between the novels: A damaged, dominant billionaire named Gideon falls for a shy, equally damaged woman named Eva, and together, they embark on an intense BDSM relationship.
If you love the first installment, you’re in luck because there are five total books in the Crossfire series. One of the biggest draws is that Crossfire touches more upon how different dynamics can be either healthy or harmful for couples depending on things like past trauma and communication—an element the story of Christian and Ana was definitely lacking.
2. BDSM Basics for Beginners by Michelle Fegatofi
If you’re longing for a straightforward guidebook to teach you the ins and outs of BDSM, look no further. BDSM Basics for Beginners by Michelle Fegatofi is the end-all be-all starting point for someone who wants to get a better idea of the lifestyle, as well as learn things like terms, guidelines, different types of relationships, and the roles different dynamics play.
If you have any experience, this book is probably too novice, but if you’re trying to find an all-encompassing starting point, you can’t go wrong with Fegatofi’s guide. Considering she has over 20 years of experience as a submissive, you’ll be in good hands.
3. The Sleeping Beauty trilogy by A.N. Roquelaure (aka Anne Rice)
If you’re a fan of Anne Rice’s gothic fiction and erotic literature, be warned: The author takes explicit sex to the next level with The Sleeping Beauty trilogy (written under the pseudonym A. N. Roquelaure). The story was first released back in the 80s and centers around Beauty, who is awakened from her famous slumber with more than a kiss.
The trilogy follows her through a life of submission and some pretty extreme BDSM. In 2015 Rice released a fourth novel to the series called Beauty’s Kingdom, which is a little less graphic and a little more story driven. If you’re a lover of the Disney tale, read with caution because your view of this character is about to change big time.
4. The New Topping Book and The New Bottoming Book by Janet Hardy and Dossie Easton
When the first editions of the Topping Book and the Bottoming Book hit the shelves in the early 90s, readers were enthralled by the candor, kindness, and detail Hardy and Easton went into to describe what it’s like (and what to consider) to be in a BDSM relationship. Part guidebooks, part anecdotal reads, the “new” editions delve deeper into both sides of the spectrum, giving readers a source for questions and comfort.
Many reviewers agree: Whether you’re a top or a bottom, these books are the place to start if you’re considering entering (or are curious about) BDSM relationships.
5. Haven by Rebekah Witherspoon
Ready for an emotionally-charged book about how BDSM can not only arouse, but heal as well? Instead of a powerful, clean-shaven billionaire, the main man is a reclusive nature photographer who lives a life of solitude with only his pup by his side. When an outgoing, city girl named Claudia lands on his doorstep in desperate need of his help post-tragedy, things get sweet and spicy.
Rebekah Witherspoon’s Beards & Bondage trilogy completely flips the script on what it means to be in a dom/sub relationship by showcasing different characters and dynamics in each installment. To give you an idea, Book two involves a dominatrix and male submissive, and book three follows a polyamorous relationship, so whatever your tastes, this series has you covered.
6. Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns by Philip Miller and Molly Devon
If you learn better with visuals and need a little hand-holding along the way, you’re in luck: Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns has it all—photos, drawings, a glossary of terms, and even an index with a comprehensive list of BDSM clubs and stores.
The humor interjected throughout makes the whole notion of diving into a BDSM dynamic a little less daunting, and you’ll even find yourself chuckling as you get in-depth knowledge about crucial components like negotiation, endorphins, and safety. Yes, all of the important info is there, but it reads more like a conversation you’d have over drinks and less like a stuffy college textbook you have to sift through.
7. The Boss Series by Abigail Barnette (Jenny Trout)
What would happen if you had an earth-shattering, mind-bending one-night stand with someone in the past, only to end up working for him years later? After finding out her no-strings-attached hookup is now the one calling the shots at work, Sophie has to decide whether or not she can put the scorching sex in the past and be ~professional.~ (Spoiler alert: It’s really hard.)
Fans of BDSM and workplace romances will feel like they’ve finally been seen in Jenny Trout’s series, and the fact that there are eight total books to devour just makes the decision to binge these at the beach that much easier.
8. Dom’s Guide to BDSM by Matthew Larocco
For doms or those who dream of taking on a dominant role, this guide is for you. As one of the highest rated BDSM how-tos on Amazon, it’s clear Matthew Larocco knows what he’s talking about. As opposed to a broad book covering the basics, as the title suggests, this guide is specifically focused on a dom/dominatrix’s role.
Not only does it highlight how to give and receive pleasure, but it’ll teach you how to reframe your thoughts, care for your sub, and ensure you become a safe, compassionate, and respectful master. If you don’t know where to start but have dreams of becoming a less problematic Christian Grey, Dom’s Guide To BDSM will get you there. And if you love Larocco’s style, he has a whole collection of guides from how to be a great sub to advance guides to how to maintain a healthy BDSM relationship.
9. The Fettered Series by Lilia Moon
While you might not think doms and wedding planners go hand-in-hand, the first book in Lila Moon’s Fettered series somehow blends the two unexpected lifestyles into one fascinating relationship??? When Emily, Seattle’s most desirable wedding planner, is asked to host a wedding at a BDSM club, she meets club owner Damon and boom…chemistry.
If you’re overworked (hi), exhausted (it me), and tired of being the one who holds it all together (yup), you’ll love Fettered’s first installment, YIELD. There are seven total books in the series highlighting different, overlapping characters, so with each installment things stay hot and fresh as you explore new relationships and dynamics.
10. The Mistress Manual: The Good Girl’s Guide to Female Dominance by Mistress Lorelei
For dominate women looking to explore BDSM with their submissive partners, there’s no better place to start than The Mistress Manual. Written by a dominatrix herself, this guide helps remove any confusion you might experience while stepping into a new, more dominant role in your relationship.
Filled with tips, facts, and suggestions geared toward female tops, Mistress Lorelei’s fun and destigmatizing manual has helped many become their best version of a dominatrix (because sexual expression isn’t one size fits all, y’all!).
11. Push The Button by Feminista Jones
Most erotic BDSM reads focus of the sensual side of the dynamic, but Feminista Jones’s Push The Button adds in an element of reality. To the outside world, the two main characters, Nicole and David, just seem like ordinary, professional Black Americans kicking ass and conquering their dreams. Behind closed doors, however, they have a dom/sub relationship that explores different variations of pain and pleasure, fantasy, and darkness.
The catch, of course, is that when Nicole’s former master comes back into the picture, readers get to see the differences between a healthy and an unhealthy dom/sub relationship. In addition to the erotic, Jones’ novel highlights the mundane aspects of this couple’s lives and normalizes BDSM bonds in a way not commonly seen in the genre.
12. The Dominance Playbook: Ways to Play With Power in Scenes and Relationships by Anton Fulmen
If you already have the BDSM basics down and want to turn things up a notch, The Dominance Playbook is just what the master ordered. As the name suggests, this is for those who are looking for new scene ideas and power dynamics. With the help of this guide, Fulmen offers v solid advice for “weaving power exchange into the fabric of a long term relationship.”
But if you still need a 101 version, you can snag Fulmen’s first installment, The Heart of Dominance, to learn the basics and get a grasp on the psychological and physical intricacies involved in a BDSM bond.
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